July 8, 2019, my first day of divorce. After nearly ten years of trying to create a perfect life, I felt hopeless and lost.
Prior to my divorce and during our separation, I was in a downward spiral. From suicidal tendencies and pneumonia, life gave me a huge kick in the balls.
Tinder, Bumble, and Grey Goose were my best friends. I did not want to be alone and would do anything I could for attention.
Most people would not view me as an alcoholic or someone who had troubles with addiction. But inside I was hurting for months and knew I had to make a change.
The Challenge I Needed
The week before my divorce was final I went up north to reflect with a good friend.
Something about getting away, made me think deeply about where my life was headed, and after we had a few beers, the next day I made a commitment to stop drinking and figure what was next.
My divorce almost cost me my life.
I heard things from close friends and family like “ man the fuck up”, just get on tinder”,” and don’t worry about her”. Which is exactly what I did, until my body shut down.
I came down with pneumonia and was in a fuck it mentality. I was hiding my feelings inside. I was good at running, I did it my…
