A SERIES OF SHORT STORIES ABOUT MY VISION FAST IN DEATH VALLEY

Honoring Our Call To Rest

Part 2/5— The First Day of Fasting

Photo by Casey Horner on Unsplash

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I hear the strong winds calling my name
It’s time to surrender and listen to what they say
East winds calling little Georgie
Explore, dance, cry, sing
Look up, it’s starting to rain

….

I was sound asleep, snuggled tightly into my sleeping bag under the stars. I awoke to the calming sound of a rattle off in the distance. The rhythms of the shakes signified it was time to enter the unknown. I knew I was going to die out there.

I took a deep breath and reminded myself of one of my favorite lines from the American poet Walt Whitman.

Come lovely and soothing death, Undulate round the world, serenely arriving, arriving, In the day, in the night, to all, to each, Sooner or later, delicate death.

Fear knotted in my stomach as silence washed over my entire body. I have become afraid of my relationship to stillness. Despite writing a book about acceptance, I still ignore the signs to slow down and honor the seasons of life.

There were demons with me. They made me dance around like puppets on strings for years. They fed on my insecurities and caused me to come face to face with death. They were disguised as addictions, careers, relationships, and even the man in the mirror. I had been running my entire life. And here I am, about to surrender to the demons that lie within the stilness of the unknown.

Photo by Tomáš Malík on Unsplash

Forgiveness fights my heart
Freedom calls my soul
37 years of a story
waiting to be told
out here you will find
great value in letting go

It had been a long few years. Everything felt surreal. However, I didn’t doubt life brought me here for a…