Member-only story
Embrace Anger to Avoid Suffering
Friday Flow 6/18/21
Author Note — Listen to the expanded version via podcast
I felt a flash of heat enter my body. A rage up and down my spine as I clenched my fists to hold on to what I needed to let go of. Twenty-nine minutes into my breathwork session this morning, I let go, and tears rushed down my face.
I’ve been more consistent with breathwork over the last six weeks.
Today’s emotion was anger.
I’m not sure where it came from, but it hid deep, preventing me from opening up to the world even more. I’ve learned to explore my relationship with anger since getting sober, and it has been one of the most interesting experiences in my life.
I’ve danced back and forth with anger a lot over the last two years, and this week I chose to apply for a vision quest this fall. I’m not sure what I am in for, but all I know is something inside of me needs to die. Naturally, something extreme as fasting in the wild four days alone seems like a good way to die- metaphorically speaking, that is.
I have been friends with this dark side of me for most of my life. Much of it was a fit of reactive anger that led to many dark days for me. These days, my anger is subsiding. When I feel angry, I am reminded that I have so much to let go of.
